


Not So Sneaky

by zarrati



Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-14
Updated: 2015-11-14
Packaged: 2018-05-01 14:22:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5209148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zarrati/pseuds/zarrati
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on the Prompt: Leslie/Ben getting caught by either Andy or April when they were secretly dating. Bonus points for Andy finding something of Leslie's around the house and April trying to do everything to get Ben or Leslie to spill the beans about the relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not So Sneaky

“Hey, babe?” Andy calls out to April from across the house.

“What?” 

He makes his way to the kitchen from the direction of the bedrooms, looking down at something in his hand with a mixture of concern and confusion.

“So, I was “accidentally” in Ben’s room because I ran out of boxers and was going to steal some of his, and I found this on the floor.”

Andy holds up a woman’s sock. But not just any woman’s sock– a sock with a waffle hand embroidered on the cuff.

A sock that could only belong to one person.

“Let me see ” April cries out and snatches the sock away from Andy’s hand. 

Andy looks over April’s shoulder as she scrutinizes the cloth. “Not that it makes a difference, ‘cause he’s still cool or whatever, but does this mean that Ben likes to dress up as a girl sometimes?”

“What? No, this is Leslie’s sock.”

Andy’s eyes grow wide. “Ben likes to dress up as Leslie?!”

“Oh my God,” April sighs in exasperation. “Leslie must have been here and at some point lost this in Ben’s room. Either that, or he secretly has a gross sock fetish or something, and he stole it from her to get off.”

“And I can see why he’d want this sock most of all, am I right?”

He gives April a knowing glance, only to be met with one of confusion.

“What are you talking about?”

Andy’s face falls once he realizes his mistake. “What? Nothing. I have no idea what your talking about and definitely don’t know anything about Ben liking Leslie. Damn it!”

April’s jaw drops and she hits Andy in the shoulder. “Ben has a thing for Leslie? I mean, it kinda does make sense ‘cause they’re both huge nerds, but why didn’t you tell me?”

“I’m sorry,” he apologizes, “but Ben made me swear not to tell because he’s her boss so they can’t date and they could both get in trouble. I mean, it’s not like they  _are_  dating, so it’s not a big deal.”

April holds up the sock and waves it in his face. “Of course it’s a big deal. You know how weird Ben has been lately–more weird than normal anyway. He’s gone all night and thinks we don’t notice and then acts all suspicious. He and Leslie are totally dating and he probably snuck her over here when we were gone.”

“Wow, he’s good. I had no idea.”

April frowns and crosses her arms over her chest. “I can’t believe those two.”

“Neither can I. I mean, the nerve! Wait, why are we mad at them?”

“Because they lied to us and are sneaking around behind our backs.”

“Oh, right,” Andy nods vigorously. “So, what are we going to do?”

April smirks and throws the sock back to Andy. “We’re going to see just how sneaky they can be. Ben made us buy actual silverware, so I think it’s time we used it and invite Leslie over for a nice dinner with us and our roommate.”

* * *

April watches Leslie from across the office as she deals with some lame woman complaining about a broken slide in one of the parks. She is stalking her prey, waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike.

“Hey, April,” Leslie asks once the annoying woman leaves. “Can you fax this requisition form over to maintenance for me?”

Plastering a face smile on her face, April places the form on her desk. “Of course, boss. I’ll get right on that.”

Leslie gives her a dubious look, but nods nonetheless. “Okay, thank you.I appreciate it.”

“No need to thank me,” April replies back with as much sincerity as she can muster. “Just, you know, doing my job to the best of my abilities. Just like you taught me.”

April tries not to flinch when Leslie puts her hand on her shoulder. “Wow, April. That is so great to hear. I’m liking this new attitude.”

“What can I say,” she shrugs. “I guess it must be married life getting to me. You know, that feeling of being with someone.”

Leslie continues to nod and smile.

“What about you?” April continues. “Any special someones in your life?”

The smile on Leslie’s face falters and she almost drops her padfolio.

“What? Me? No, no special anyone’s anywhere. Been flying solo recently.” She gestures awkwardly below her belt. “This hasn’t seen a customer in so long, it’s about to have a going out of business sale,” she finishes with a grimace.

“Okay, well that was gross, but I guess that means no hot date tonight then, right? No huge plans?”

“Nope, no, uh, no plans. Just me, the History Channel, and some scrapbooks. You know how I do it. Me, all alone, at my house…alone.”

April narrows her eyes and nods slowly. “Okay, then, I guess since you’re free you can come over for dinner.  We actually have plates and forks and stuff now, so you should come over and use them with us.”

“Oh, I don’t know,” Leslie tries to argue. “It’s so last minute and I really–”

“What?” April cuts in. “I thought you said you didn’t have plans. Ben’ll be there, and he seemed really happy that you were coming.”

Leslie furrows her brow. “Ben knows? He didn’t mention anything–”

“Oh, so you talked to Ben recently? I didn’t know you were working on anything that needed the approval of the Assistant City Manager. When did you last see him?”

“What I meant was that the last time I talked to him several days ago when saw him about work related things, he hadn’t mentioned anything,” Leslie says with a swallow and mild look of panic.

“This was a recent development.”

Leslie forces out a laugh. “Oh, okay. That makes complete sense. A lot can happen in a few days, since, you know, that’s the last time I really got to talk to him.”

“Right,” April deadpans, “so you’re coming? Great. Be there by six.”

She walks away before Leslie can argue.

* * *

April’s in the process of setting the table when a frazzled Ben comes running through the front door. His hair is sticking up in all directions from running his hands through it–a habit he does when nervous–and he’s so out of breath he looks like he ran home.

“Oh, hey April,” he tries to say nonchalantly between pants of breath. “Uh, wh-what are you up to?”

“Why do you look like you’re dying?”

Ben waves her off. “Oh, nothing, just wanted to get home. So, what’s up? I heard that we’re having someone over for dinner. Wait, you’re not cooking, are you?”

She turns around to glance at the empty stove top. “Yes, Ben, I am. Don’t you see the pots and pans on the stove and me slaving away over your food.”

“Look, if you expect me to cook-”

“God, relax,” she says as she sets down the last piece of silverware. “Andy’s out getting take-out from that Italian place. You’re so uptight. How did you find out, anyway?”

Ben drops his briefcase with a frown and walks over to her, running another nervous hand through his hair. “I, uh, I ran into Leslie at City Hall and she mentioned it. She was quite surprised to hear that I had no idea what she was talking about. You know, you guys really need to start treating me like an equal member of this household and tell me when you’re planning things.”

“Would you just chill. It’s not like it’s some crazy party or anything. You don’t have to do anything. It’s just Leslie coming over for dinner.” She raises her eyebrow. “Unless you had plans tonight or have a problem with Leslie, I don’t see what the big deal is.  _Do_  you have a problem?”

Ben licks his lip nervously, and she can see a bead of sweat forming on his forehead.

“What? No, I didn’t have any plans. Just a quiet night in. And Leslie’s great. I mean, she’s a great friend and coworker and all around person who also eats dinner so there is no reason why we can’t all do that together.”

April stares at his shaking hands and nervous smile and wonders how on earth he managed to keep any relationship he had with Leslie a secret. The man could barely say her name without freaking out. By the end of the night, one of them, or both, would break.

A knock on the door makes Ben nearly jump out of his skin.

“That’s probably Leslie,” April says unnecessarily while Ben stares with wide eyes at the front door. “Don’t just stand there. Answer it, I’m busy.”

“You’re just standing there.”

“After cleaning the house and setting the table,” she shoots back. “What have  _you_  done today to help with this dinner?”

“I didn’t know about it until an hour ago!”

“Stop being so lazy and just answer the damn door.”

He turns around and takes a deep, steadying breath before going to the door like a man walking to his death.

Leslie is visibly startled seeing Ben answer the door, but she does her best to paste a genial, professional smile on her face.

“Hello, Ben, how are you this evening?”

Ben steps to the side and lets her in. “I’m doing well, thank you. How about yourself?”

“Quite well, thank you.” She hands him a bottle of wine. “Thank you for inviting me into your home.” She spots April over Ben’s shoulder and smiles, making her way over to her as though she can’t run away from Ben fast enough. “Hi, April, how are you?”

“I’m fine,” she replies, giving Leslie a tight lipped smile. “I just finished setting the table, and Andy should be here any second with the food.”

“Oh, you guys shouldn’t have gone through any trouble for dinner,” Leslie says as she busies herself pouring a glass of wine.

“Well, Ben didn’t come home early enough to cook, so we had to order out.”

“I told you, I didn’t know about this dinner.”

April rolls her eyes. “Whatever. We’ll just up your rent this month to cover the cost.”

Ben simply sighs and takes a large sip of wine, trying far too hard to avoid Leslie’s line of sight.

The next few minutes before Andy arrives with the food are painful, with Leslie doing her best to kill the silence. April purposely contributes nothing to the conversation and is enjoying every torturous second of awkward small talk. 

Leslie and Ben breath a visible sigh of relief when Andy walks through the door, food in hand, and gives them both a bright smile.

“Hey you guys,” he says while placing the food down on the kitchen counter. “Glad you could come, Leslie, and try out our new fancy silverware with us. We’re all happy to have you over. Aren’t we, Ben?”

Ben startles and almost spills his drink. “Uhm, yeah, definitely. Always great having friends over.”

Andy smiles widely between the two of them before winking at April over his shoulder.

“Ok, well, you guys can go have a seat and we’ll bring the food right out.”

“Are you sure I can’t help?” Leslie tries to argue, but April shoos her out of the kitchen.

Ben and Leslie take seats across from one another at the small dining room table and don’t utter a word to one another, finding the silverware and place mats far more interesting than they should. 

“So, what happened when I was gone?” Andy whispers to April as he dishes out the pasta.

“Basically a whole lot of this. They are so awkward it’s amazing. When she first got here, they talked like they barely knew each other. They’re trying so hard to not be obvious, that they’re even  _more_  obvious.”

“Are we just going to tell them that we know?”

April picks up the dish of pasta and shakes her head. “And ruin all of this awkward tension? Are you kidding me? No way. I want to drag this out as much as possible until they explode and spill their guts.”

Andy grabs the bread sticks and follows April to the dining room. 

“Sooooo,” April draws out once the four are seated and eating, “Leslie, how are things? Anything new and exciting going on with you?”

Leslie briefly looks in Ben’s direction, but his eyes remain trained on his plate. “Oh, you know, nothing really. Pretty busy at work with the new projects we’re trying to implement. And Ann’s working at City Hall now, so that’s great.”

“Yeah, I notice that you spend a lot of time in Ann’s office now.”

“Well, she  _is_  my best friend,” Leslie answers slowly. 

“You must run into Ben then, right?” Andy interjects. “I see him going into Ann’s office right after you all the time.”

Ben almost chokes on his dinner and starts coughing loudly. 

“You okay there, buddy?” Andy asks while hitting him on the back.

“Yeah, sorry. Food went down the wrong pipe.”

“It’s okay, man. Happens to the best of us. So, anyway, I guess you see Leslie a lot there?”

Ben clears his throat. “Uhm, yeah I guess so.”

“The City Manager’s office is working very closely with the Health Department on a new wellness campaign,” Leslie jumps in. “So, you know, a lot of paperwork and brainstorming with Ann.”

Ben quickly nods his head in agreement. “Yeah.”

“What’s the project?” April asks.

“Diabetes awareness-” “Heart disease-” Leslie and Ben both answer at the same time.

“Well, both of them,” Leslie tries to recover. “They’re working on a few different projects simultaneously.”

Andy shoves another forkful of food in his mouth. “What about when she leaves? Like half the time I see you both go in there, Ann leaves right after.”

April doesn’t think Ben could get any more pale, but she’s wrong.

Leslie does her best to laugh it off. “Oh you know Ann. She has a bladder the size of a thimble. I’m always telling her “Ann, stop drinking so much coffee before meetings” but she never listens. Right Ben?”

Ben wipes his sweaty palms on his pants and nods. “Uhm, yup. She takes a lot of bathroom breaks.”

“See. Told you.”

April narrows her eyes, but Leslie ignores her look and goes back to studying her dinner.

Knowing full well that Ben is the weakest link, April turns her attention to him.

“So, I’m surprised you could actually make it tonight. You’ve been pretty busy lately after work.”

Ben looks at her sharply and drops his fork. “What? I-I don’t know what you mean.”

“Just that you’re barely around. I mean, we love that you still pay rent and are hardly here, but still. What have you been up to?”

Ben gapes at her. “Uhm, you know, nothing huge. Been working late a lot, running errands…”

“That take all night?”

“Oh wow!” Leslie practically yells. “This food is amazing. What is it?”

“It’s spaghetti and meatballs, Leslie,” April answers. “You’ve eaten this from here like a million times before.”

“Well, it tastes better than usual tonight.”

April leans back in her chair and crosses her arms. “You’re acting weird. Like, really weird. In fact, both of you are. Ben has barely said a word all night, and usually we can’t get him to shut up about stupid Star Trek or whatever, and you,” she points to Leslie, “are talking in your high pitched, nervous voice.”

Leslie’s voice raises almost another octave. “I don’t have a high pitched nervous voice.”

“Yes, you do. Right there. You did it again.”

“April, nothing is going on. And what about you?” Leslie pins April with a stare of her own. “You’ve been acting strange all night, too. Since when do you invite me over for dinner or ask questions like you’re genuinely interested in other people’s lives. You never do that.”

“I want to know why you and Ben have been lying to us and acting so strange.”

“April, we haven’t been acting strange. No one is lying.”

April grunts in frustration. “Yes, you have!”

“April, I don’t think any of this is your business,” Ben cuts in. 

“You’re my roommate and she’s my boss. That makes it my business when you lie to me.”

Andy watches back and forth as the three argue, growing more and more anxious as their voices raise.

“I found Leslie’s sock,” he yells, and the room grows silent.

“What do you mean you found my sock?” 

April gives him a look telling him to stop, but Andy can’t help himself.

“I found your sock in Ben’s room.”

“I thought you said you’d respect my space and not go in there when I’m not home,” Ben huffs.

“God, shut up, Ben,” April reprimands. “This isn’t about you.”

“Anyway,” Andy continues, “I was in your room looking for boxers and I found Leslie’s sock on your floor. I might have accidentally told April about your crush and she realized that you were acting all weird and sneaking out at night so we think that you’re dating and wanted to catch you guys and make you confess.”

Leslie and Ben continue to stare at him in shock while April scowls.

“I’m sorry, babe,” he says to her, “but everyone was yelling and I couldn’t take it anymore.” He looks back and forth between Ben and Leslie. “But we’re right, right? You two are running around secret-dating?”

Leslie makes a face like she’s about to argue, but Ben just sighs in resignation. “Just stop trying to argue, Leslie. They’re gonna make our lives hell unless we come clean.”

“Okay, yes, fine,” Leslie relents. “We like each other and have been dating in secret for several weeks because of Chris’ dumb rule. Are you happy now?”

Andy pumps his fist into the air. “Yes, we knew it. Well, April knew it then told me, but anyway, that’s awesome, you guys. Congratulations.”

“Thank you,” Ben says with a small smile but soon turns serious. “But you need to understand why we didn’t say anything. Chris is deadly serious about this rule. You can’t tell anyone or we could both be fired. Got it?”

April just shrugs and rolls her eyes while Andy mimes locking his lips and throwing away the key.

“You’re secret is safe with us, roomy.” He props his head on his hands and looks between them with a sappy smile. “You two are so cute together. I told Ben he should just go for, because Leslie, you are like the greatest ever.”

Leslie hides a faint blush and reaches over to take Ben’s hand, the first contact they’ve had all evening. 

“Thank you, Andy.” She lets out a deep sigh. “Wow, it feels good getting that off of my chest.”

“Good,” April says. “Maybe now you can both start acting like normal people instead of all awkward and jumpy.”

“Oh, come on, we weren’t that bad.”

“Yeah, you were. It was painful to watch. I mean I loved it because Ben looked constipated and you looked like you were about to cry four different times, but it was pretty bad. You were trying so hard to not give anything away, that you basically ignored each other. Even before you started dating, you nerds were always talking about something no one else cared about and doing weird finger guns at each other. Just, don’t freak out about it so much and you should be fine.”

Leslie nods her head. “Yeah, you’re probably right. We just haven’t really had to deal with this in public yet, and we’re not sure how to handle everything. We figured it would be safest to interact as little as possible so you wouldn’t notice that things changed.”

“Please,” April scoffs. “You two were always gross and flirty. If you change that now, everyone’s gonna know somethings up.”

“But yeah,” Andy jumped in. “You don’t have to worry about us saying anything. And now that we know, Leslie can come over and we can all hang out and double date here so you don’t have to worry about going out in public. We can watch movies and play X-Box.”

Ben looks less than pleased with the idea. “Uhm, thanks. You’ll probably see more of Leslie over here since it looks less suspicious than me being over at her place, but we’ll most likely just stick to ourselves and stay in my room.”

April makes a face. “Gross, Ben. TMI.”

“I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Sure you didn’t. But no sex in the house. It’s one of the rules.”

Andy laughs at April and pats Ben on the back. “Don’t listen to her. She’s just messing around. I mean, we have sex in the house all of the time.”

“Okay,” Leslie cuts Andy off. “Let’s just go back to eating our dinner and finally being able to enjoy ourselves. It’ll be nice not having to put on an act anymore.”

“Fine,” April sighs, “but don’t be too gross and affectionate or I’ll throw up and leave.”

“I think we’ll manage to restrain ourselves,” Ben smirks.

“But it is nice to know that you care, April.”

“Ew, no I don’t. I just wanted you to feel uncomfortable and make you spill your dirty secret. I couldn’t care less about your love lives.”

Leslie and Ben give her an indulgent smile and go back to eating their pasta, everyone enjoying the new, lighter atmosphere. 

April would never admit it out loud, but she’s happy for them–happy that they have a new place to feel comfortable in their relationship. But it was certainly fun watching them squirm. 

And if they think this is the last time she’ll give them hell about it, they’re dead wrong.  

“Oh,” Leslie says once the dinner dishes have been cleared away. “I am going to need my sock back.”


End file.
